In the papers this morning both the New York Times and the Washington Post had articles regarding gay marriage. The Post article talked about polling in swing states that now a majority of people approve of same sex marriage. The article in the Times was about one man who devotes his life to stopping gay marriage; he was influential in CA and wants to be at the forefront of all other states that have gay marriage on the ballots this year. His premise is that the traditional family is a woman and a man raising their kids together. This brings many issues to mind for me; from the hypocrisy, to the outright bigotry thats allowed to be said freely; to the religious hypocrisy and the political malfeasance.
Lets start with traditional marriage – 2 parents raising kids, sounds great but doesnt happen. Divorce rate is about 50%, there are record numbers of single parent homes. If traditional marriage is so meaningful why has there been no outreach or help for married couples, I dont see any of these so called family values people spending anytime trying to reduce the divorce rate. If their real goal was to have a traditional family they would be taking their money and trying to teach people how to stay married, what to do before you get married to make sure you are a compatible couple. None of this has anything to do with gay marriage. The tens of millions of dollars that are spent to deny gay people their civil rights could be used for education or a myriad of positive things. Instead its spent on spreading hate.
There are those who say the bible says a marriage is between a man and a woman. What most people leave out is that the bible says in marriage the husband owns his wife. She is his property and he can do with her what he pleases. So the religious argument is completely moot as I dont think women consider themselves the property of their husbands. Whats striking to me here is that the black churches and many black people are vehemently against same sex marriage. This shocks me; did they see the part in the bible that says blacks are considered 3/5 of a person, how slavery is not only justified but also encouraged. Do black people forget that they were the last group fighting for civil rights? You would think that a group that has been as oppressed as the black community they would be there to help others with civil rights. Instead the black churches could be considered a modern day KKK – no killings but filled with hate and wanting to deny gay people’s civil rights. I am sure there were many gays who worked tirelessly for the civil rights act in the 1960s; I wonder if they would have tried so hard if they had known that once black people started receiving their civil rights they would be so anti gay. Interestingly enough just last week Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas acknowledged that when the Founding Fathers wrote the Constitution starting with “We the People…” that did not include black people.
From what I know of the law the judiciary branch is in place to make sure that the rights of minorities are upheld; otherwise this country could turn into a mob-rule society. So civil rights are not decided by a popular vote; they are decided on the basis of the reading of the law. So, I do not understand why same sex marriage is on ballots in any states. When the Supreme Court ruled that interracial marriage was legal 70% of the American public was against it. That was not put on a ballot. Neither should same sex marriage.
What really blows my mind the most is all the money, time and attention that is focused on denying gays their civil rights. Is this the top priority of family values groups, black churches, politicians, hate mongers and the Catholic Church and the Pope? The Catholic Church is anti gay; why dont they spend their time and money weeding out all the predators in their midst. The Mormon Church spent $20M and organized petitions in CA to vote down gay marriage. Why are people so full of hate? That money and time couldnt have been used for something more productive, something for charity? With all of the crisis we face as a Country denying a group of people their civil liberties should not even be on the list.
My prediction for the future is that same sex marriage will not only be accepted it will be encouraged by society. People under 30 years old dont even think of being gay as an issue; to them its like someone being left handed. In another generation educated people wont even think of the issue of who is gay and who isn’t, and if they get married. Until then the people I talked about above are going to be seen on the wrong side of history and essentially hate groups.
I myself got married last year; same sex marriage, or Marriage Equality was passed in NY last year so my parter of 19 years and I got married. Now we have fewer worries about inheritance, taxes, health insurance. I dont know many marriages today that last 20 years but ours is. Its time to move on to inclusion and using our time and money to help the less fortunate.