Its Official The Manor Will Be on the Market Soon

Yes, its time to move back to Manhattan so the papers were signed today to put the Manor on the market. Corcoran will be taking care of the details. Photographers, floor plan people, and all the rest will be going on the next few weeks then they will broadcast the Limestone globally but no one will be able to see it until the first open house. I hear the Brooklyn Brownstone market is red hot with pandemonium at open houses, bidding wars etc. This Limestone is perfect but its time to go back to that deluxe apartment in the sky where they do everything for you. Keep your eyes out for teasers and more details, especially if you are in the market for the home with every detail intact. IMG_1156

What’s The Best Way to Achieve Marriage Equality

IMG_0666You cant get away from it, the news everywhere today is all about same sex marriage, what the Supremes will do; tomorrow the news and coverage will be all about DOMA and if its constitutional. If you read my last blog posting you will know I am in complete support of total equality in every way, including marriage. But, an interesting question has been brought up; whats the best way to accomplish equal rights for gays and non-gays alike. People refer back to Roe v Wade, even Ruth Bader Ginsburg said that ruling was over reaching. If the SCOTUS rules that same sex marriage is a constitutional right for everyone will this matter become the topic of endless debate 40 years from now? That obviously isnt an optimal outcome. People like Peggy Noonan from The Wall Street Journal say let things slow down; the momentum is there, Americans are more and more supporting same sex marriage and to let it happen in time. Her premise is that a court ruling would have a worse effect. It could harden opponents positions and make people feel like same sex marriage is being pushed down their throats. Unfortunately this argument carries some weight. Close minded people could see a ruling by the Supremes as infringing on their civil liberties. This is what happens when you are living in a nation that is filled with small minded bigoted people. The kind of people that think the world is flat and evolution is just a theory.

The Constitution was written such that the court system would be the counter weight to a majority rule society. That the SCOTUS branch of government is there to protect minority groups when no one else will. It is completely obvious that same sex marriage and gay rights are a given right of every American. But, when things happen too fast is the backlash counterproductive? In reality, probably. When you live in a country where people hate the president because of his color, and make up myriads of excuses to disagree and disrespect him it shouldnt be a surprise to anyone that these same people would be against gay rights and marriage. That somehow same sex marriage would be a religious catastrophe but getting multiple divorces (Newt) is fine; you know the type the ones who pick and choose what part of the bible they obey and what part they dont. Very interesting to me, who is  non religious, the new Pope emphasizes helping the needy and the poor.

In my mind this is a no brainer; the court should rule that all citizens be treated equally, period. Its a very easy call. But in the long run are gays and same sex marriage supporters better off having a half win at the court; then let the natural progression of things happen as more and more people support same sex marriage is that the better way to go? Over 75% of people under 30 approve of same sex marriage. Even for Evangelicals 60% under 30 years old approve. As George Will said, the opposition is literally dying off. So, whats the answer? How do u best deal with a group of bigoted small minded people. Thats a tough one. As a gay man who is married to another man I am obviously in full support. I love the idea of young kids growing up knowing it doesnt matter if they are gay or non-gay they have the same opportunities and are able to have any kind of future they want. To me that is more important than what I personally go through or want as a right of law.

In a grown up society with intelligent people the answer is simple: treat all citizens as equals under the Constitution. As a divided country filled with people full of hate slower might be the better route. I think the way our Country was set up including the Constitution and Declaration of Independence the Supreme Court of the United States should rule in favor of equality for all, thats what this country was founded on and those are our principles. Its time to set aside the bigoted set and do what’s right for people.

Why We Need Marriage Equality

IMG_1401Whats happening in the country right now is pretty remarkable in regards to Americans views of gay people. More and more Americans approve of same sex marriage, the latest CNN poll showed 58% of the public approves of same sex marriage. As more people realize they have gay kids, relatives, friends they realize there is no reason to discriminate against gay people. And for the upcoming generation, people under 30, they dont care in the least of someone is gay or straight. There are still ultra conservatives that are highly against gay marriage; I always wonder why those people dont spend more of an effort to reduce divorce than they do to try to deny peoples civil rights. Let me be totally clear, the way I see it and the way I understand the Constitution all citizens are to be treated equally and are able to pursue happiness. This issue is clearly a legal and moral verdict that says gays should be able to marry and be treated as equals to their non-gay peers.  Its pretty amazing that it was as recently as 2004 that Karl Rove used same sex marriage as a political wedge issue to get people out to vote for George W. Bush. The hate towards gays that that brought out was a disgrace in American history. It allowed gay youth to be bullied, beaten and killed. Karl Rove using peoples lives like that will certainly haunt him if there is an afterlife.

I want to focus on other parts of this issue; same sex marriage is good for our country, community and family itself. In the past gays had always been ridiculed, portrayed in movies as hopelessly destined to live a miserable life. In the Reagan years Ronnie was known to tell gay jokes to his buddies. Ronnie also, because of his bigotry towards gays, ignored the HIV/AIDS crisis for 7 years because he thought it was a gay disease. This of how many lives around the world would be saved today if Reagan allocated research funds to combat the disease. Now its a global epidemic with millions dying, which perhaps could have been lessened if Reagan had lifted a finger. This is an example of how discrimination against gays has actually hurt the entire world.

I want to talk about how acceptance of gay people will help the world, the U.S.A. and most importantly gay youth. When I was a kid struggling with my sexual identity I honestly didnt know what I was. Depictions of gays on TV or in the movies were all of very effeminate hairdresser type people. I knew that wasnt me so it was confusing for a teenager. I am so glad that there are positive role model examples for gay youth now, people who are willing to speak out and come out. Suicide rates among gay youth are about triple what they are of non-gay youth. Now if young people can see positive role models who are gay they can start to feel better about themselves and more accepted into society. This is where same sex marriage comes in and comes in strongly. If a young man in high school realizes he is gay and can not only deal with the fact that its ok he is gay; but he along with his non-gay friends can grow up and pursue part of the American dream that includes getting married and having a family. This is so important that the youth in our country feel that they have a future. Its equally important for the country to see that gays can and want to settle down for a longterm traditional marriage. What a great example this would show society, especially if the gay divorce rate is significantly lower than the non-gay divorce rate. Having married gay couples in a neighborhood, with or without children, would show such great stability to our nation that has a divorce rate of over 50%.  Also for those gay married couples that want children what better way is there for them to adopt, to have an arrangement to have their own kids. Stability is what this country needs and same sex marriage can bring it to our society.

Same sex marriage is vitally important to the future of our country. That high school boy no longer has to think of committing suicide he can think of a future just like his peers. For society the stability this could bring is something to learn from.  Its time to think about the future, the future of kids growing up who will one day run this country and world. People are born gay, just like they are born left handed. Its time to let the gay community become complete equals of non-gays and our society will be better off.

My goal is to have that high school boy or girl realize their future has the same opportunities and excitement as their peers. Join me in making a better future for them.

“With Positions to Fill, Employers Wait for Perfection” A Must Read For Job Seekers and HR

imagesThis is a fantastic article from the New York Times that is a must read for anyone unemployed, interviewing, looking for a job or working for a hiring company. The article goes in depth about companies making candidates go through 20 interviews per job; and still not get hired. It really shows what many have told me directly, that candidates are in good faith applying for jobs and jumping through hoops and continuing to be unemployed for weeks, months and years. If you are going through this yourself, or know others who are, please read this article. It validates what you are going through and can help others understand what its like out there.

The full article is at http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/07/business/economy/despite-job-vacancies-employers-shy-away-from-hiring.html?ref=todayspaper

I would also like to see an article or series of articles about the human toll of years of rejection. I have spoken to many therapists who say their clients, the ones that can afford to go, are in deep states of depression over the endless rejection and the endless days with no job to go to. Substance abuse is spiking and marriages are ending because of this crisis. In the meantime, start with this article, and the comments too.

Today We Honor Valerie Harper

Valerie HarperIt was just announced this morning that Ms. Harper has terminal brain cancer and is likely to survive only 3 months. This is heart breaking news, I have always loved and respected her. Mary Tyler Moore Show would not have been as good as it was without Valerie. Rhoda was so fun, her own spin off TV show wasnt as good but I feel like Valerie has always been around. When I was a young kid watching MTM I didnt know this was the first TV show starring a single woman; the show seemed natural and warm and always fun. There was something about Rhoda that always seemed like the underdog you wanted to root for. This is such sad news, since like I said I feel Valerie Harpers smiling sincere face has always been around. My father also died of a brain tumor so it brings back memories.

Today I want to honor and thank Valerie Harper for all the good times she has brought all of us and to wish her doctors wrong and that she survives much longer. With this news, not even Mary can ‘turn the world on with her smile.’